In my dream, I went to an animal shelter. It wasn’t completely clear to me why I was going to an animal shelter, but I apparently wanted to adopt a cat. It’s possible that this dream was a direct outgrowth of Flanny yowling at 3 am and me vaguely fantasizing about killing her, possibly by sealing her up in the tupperware container that holds the kibbling she was yowling for. So naturally, with Flanny killed off in my sleep-muddled brain, I fell back asleep and dreamed of the need to adopt a new cat.
A dog-friendly cat, I specified. Or at least a cat who was not afraid of dogs. Also, not a Siamese mix. Never again a cat with a drop of Siamese blood. Enough with the yowling. The lady at the animal shelter led me down a long hallway of cat cages, where I noticed an unusual trend. All of the cages held five cats. Not like a litter of kittens, either, but five grown cats.
“Oh, we only adopt them in sets of five. We’ve found it works out best that way. And all of these sets have already been checked to be sure that they’re compatible with each other,” the lady said.
Now, in real life, I would have laughed my head off, and said, “I’m not looking to adopt a Crazy Cat Lady Starter Kit.”
But in the dream, of course, I proceeded to look at these cat “sets” to see if I liked any of them. What I quickly discovered was that nearly every single group of cats contained … a squirrel. Four cats and a squirrel, or in one case, three cats and two squirrels. When I asked the animal shelter worker, she had a ready answer.
“Oh, it’s because of that video going around on the internet of the mother cat nursing the baby squirrel. Now everybody who finds an abandoned baby squirrel thinks that’s the best thing to do–let a mother cat nurse it. Basically, what it means is that we’ve got all these squirrels who think they’re cats.”
All well and good, but I have two large dogs, so I didn’t think it would be good for me to adopt a squirrel, no matter how fervently it believed it was a cat. So I kept looking.
Finally, I found a cat set that had no squirrels in it. Just five regular cats, none of whom seemed to be part Siamese. Downside: they were all white. Five white cats. Some short hair, some long hair, but all white. So I signed the paperwork and took them home. Yep, the person who wears all black, adopted five white cats. I hope my next stop in my dream was to buy a bunch of those lint rollers.